Chapter XXXVIII: Metaphorically Speaking

In the kitchen of my apartment, there are two trash cans of equal size. One is grey and unmarked. The other is blue and inscribed with the words "WE RECYCLE" as well as the triangular recycle logo. This is not true, however. A few months ago, I successfully imposed by libertarian waste disposal agenda upon my roommates and now we use the two trash cans interchangeably.

That is to say, you can expect to find the same quantity of "recycleable" and unrecycleable material in each one at any given time. For a riveting discussion of why "recycleable" is in quotation marks, and a new perspective on public recycling programs, refer the the essay I wrote here. You will have to wait 35 seconds before the website lets you download it.

I took out the trash in both trash cans today, and there was only one replacement trash bag left, which resulted in the irony of the box that used to contain trash bags being disposed of in the last trash bag that it contained. *Metaphor Warning* I started thinking about old people and how they are always fearing that their children will no longer find them relevant and toss them aside like yesterday's garbage. How was is that Ewan McGregor put it in Trainspotting? Something to the effect of "...rotting away at the end of it all. Pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you spawned to replace yourself." A dire scenario indeed.

On the other hand, the empty box was the first thing that went into the trash bag. Perhaps this reflects how the younger generation internalizes the wisdom of its elders. After all, a person's first, and arguably most important, education is from his parents--what we learn in childhood serves as the foundation for everything else in our lives.

Personally, I think I'd rather toss the geezers aside like yesterday's garbage.

Trivia: XXXVIII, the Roman numeral notation for this chapter, has as many characters as the word "Chapter."

Image of the Day: My favorite shirt: Live Si Iloccrob